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Dec 11, 2019 2300 Dr. Anjali Joy, India
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Knock Knock

Having dozed off while studying, I heard a knock. I immediately raced to the door, my heart pounding, with the hope of finding one of my new friends waiting for me at the entrance. The opened door revealed no one. Yet my hopes were not completely dashed and, in expectant bewilderment, I peered down the hostel corridors for any sign of my anonymous knocker.

I was staying at a JMJ convent back then. As the church was adjacent to the hostel I went to the daily 6:30 a.m. Holy Mass. On the very first day I woke up early and got ready for Mass only to discover that the doors of the church were closed. Undaunted, I left, hoping to return soon with better prospects. I did, again and again and again, but all in vain.

My efforts only amounted to frustration. I turned in desperation to the statue of the Holy Family, which stood in front of the hostel. My feet drew me closer but as each step brought me nearer to the statue I felt my heart waiver in its earlier resolution to return to the church. “Shall I go?” I said with one step. “Or shall I not?” I said with the next. I reached the statue on a “not” so, taking one more step, I closed the last gap and gazed up at the child Jesus. I poured out my heart to child Jesus about my morning dilemma, telling Him how I had awoke early just to go to church, complaining to Him of the closed doors, reminding Him of all the times He had watched me walk to and from the church and back again, finally bewailing my frustration at the unfairness of the whole situation.

All I could see was a smile on His face. It was only after I had begun to walk away that His response reached my heart. “How many times have I come to your heart and found it closed?” He asked me. “Do you know how deeply it saddened me to wait outside the doors of your closed hear?!”

His words burned my soul and I spun around to see the dear face of the child Jesus. He was still smiling. What else could I do but smile in return? Through the closed doors of the church He had opened my eyes to the pain my own closed heart had brought Him.

I am familiar with the picture portraying Jesus standing in front of the door; to think of it as the door of my own heart, where He was waiting outside and knocking, was something that had never occurred to me. What pain I had caused Him because I had been too busy to open the door to let Him in!

“Listen! I stand at the door and knock; if any hear My voice and open the door, I will come into their house and eat with them, and they will eat with Me” (Revelation 3:20).

We must constantly be reminded of our Lord’s presence outside our hearts! How ignorant we often are to the knocking on the door of our hearts! We must open our hearts to the Lord, who is a loving God and never tires of knocking, no matter how much our ignorance hurts Him. The child Jesus has inspired me to open the door of my heart. He is there, smiling, outside of yours as well. Will you let Him in?

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Dr. Anjali Joy

Dr. Anjali Joy is currently pursuing post-graduation in medicine. As a Catholic, she is constantly learning to live true to the faith, under the guidance of her loving parents and her parish priest. Anjali lives with her family in Andhra Pradesh, India.

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