Isn’t happiness something that we all wish to attain? But the methods we use to achieve it are so diverse.

There is a small book named Happiness, written by the Dalai Lama, where he outlines three tips for lasting happiness.

Primarily, “There is a big difference between appearance and reality.” It is a misconception that achieving certain things is bound to bring joy. For example, for anyone in the movie world, the Oscars are the ultimate dream. But, at least nine Academy Award holders have taken their lives to date. Victory is not the basis of joy. Appearance is not reality.

Saint Paul wrote most of his letters from behind prison bars. During his days of incarceration, he never gave much thought to himself or his impending death sentence. He was busy making himself useful for his remaining days. Haven’t you ever felt that your past achievements have not given you lasting happiness? Appearances will pass, contentment is intrinsic—search for that.

Secondly, “Count your blessings.” By meditating on the graces we have received, we will learn to overcome the wounds in life. More often than not, under the weight of our perceived losses, we tend to forget the graces we have been blessed with.

Once, renowned author and thinker Norman Vincent Peale was approached by a man who lamented the loss of ‘everything.’ He told Peale: “Life has only given me failures, there is nothing left to hope in, my business especially is lost beyond all hope.” Dr. Peale listened to him attentively and consoled him. He then took a blank paper, drew a line in the middle, and asked the man to write his losses on the left and his assets on the right. He wrote so many things on the left, but the right side was totally blank. Peale asked: “Did your wife leave you?” He replied that she was a very loving person. “Are your children imprisoned?” He was shocked and said that his children are very smart and God-fearing. “Are you handicapped in any way?” No, his health was totally sound. After a brief moment of silence, he spoke out loud: “Forgetting the blessings received from God is my real fault.” He then returned home a happy man.

The third is to “Practice love, forgiveness, and compassion.” Can love be practiced? Definitely! Practice small acts of love: visiting the elderly, feeding the hungry, intentionally avoiding some happiness to make someone else happy…the options are many. When you practice love, you eventually become love. It is the same with forgiveness. Revenge is animalistic and will never lead you to joy. If we plan retribution on every person who traps us, we will waste this whole life on revenge. Darkness can only be scattered with light; hatred can only be conquered with love. Forgiveness is the best possible alternative.

The virtue of mercy should also be practiced. It is not an emotion but a choice. Compassion is the decision to be part of the other’s sorrow. We witness, on a daily basis, many lives being destroyed by wars and terrorism. Can we pray for them, adopt them in spirit, and be a part of their suffering? Great joy will find us.

Take any miracle performed by Jesus—they were signs of the great compassion that He felt for mankind. A compassionate heart is the precious gift that He gives to anyone who stays close to Him.

Let us be happier individuals in 2024 and not let the things of this world steal our happiness.