My Heart Beats for You

It was fully my intention to have all of the Winona-Rochester seminarians stand at one point during my installation Mass homily. I had told the people that, in the words of John Paul II, ecclesia de eucharistia (the Church comes from the Eucharist), and since the Eucharist comes from priests, it logically follows that if there are no priests, there will be no Church. So I wanted everyone to see and acknowledge the young men in our diocese who are actively discerning a call to this indispensably important way of life. During the ovation, something came to me as an inspiration. I hadn’t planned to say it. It wasn’t in my text. But I blurted out, as the applause was dying down: “Let’s double their number in the next five years!” A confirmation that this was perhaps from the Holy Spirit is that people, at every stop I’ve made so far in the diocese, have, with enthusiasm, echoed those words back to me. In fact, the leader of one of the Serra groups has told me that she and her colleagues have decided to take up the challenge.  We have twenty seminarians, at both the college and major theology levels, which is pretty good for a diocese our size. And we have a wonderful coterie of priests, both active and ‘retired,’ who are busily serving our nearly one hundred parishes. But those under retirement age number only around sixty, and all of our priests are stretched thin. Furthermore, there will be no priestly ordinations in Winona-Rochester for the next two years. So, there is no question: We need more priests. Now, bishops and priests do indeed have a key role to play in the encouragement of vocations. What draws a young man to the priesthood is, above all, the witness of happy, healthy priests. Some years ago, the University of Chicago conducted a survey to determine which professions were the happiest. By a rather large margin, those deemed most content were members of the clergy. Moreover, a variety of surveys have demonstrated that, despite the troubles of recent years, Catholic priests report very high levels of personal satisfaction with their lives. Given these data, one recommendation I would make to my brother priests is this: Let people see it! Let them know how much joy you take in being a priest.  But I believe that lay people have an even more important role to play in the cultivation of vocations. Within the Protestant context, sometimes the son of a great preacher follows in his father’s footsteps so that one minister effectively begets another. But this, for obvious reasons, can’t happen in a Catholic setting. Instead, priests, without exception, come from lay people; they come from families. The decency, prayerfulness, kindness, and encouragement of parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, and uncles make an enormous difference in the fostering of a vocation to the priesthood. One of the most vivid memories of my childhood is of my father, kneeling in intense prayer after Communion one Sunday at St. Thomas More Parish in Troy, Michigan. I was only five or six at the time, and I considered my father the most powerful man on earth. That he was kneeling in supplication before someone more powerful shaped my religious imagination profoundly and, as you can tell, I’ve never forgotten the moment. Both of my parents loved and respected priests and made sure that we kids had steady contact with them. Trust me, their openness of spirit in regard to priests affected my vocation deeply. And please remember that non-family members can light the flame of a vocation as well. Study after study has shown that one of the most important factors in convincing a young man to enter the seminary is that a trusted friend, colleague, or elder told him that he would make a good priest. I know that there are lots of folks who harbor in their hearts the conviction that a young man should enter the seminary, for they have noticed his gifts of kindness, prayerfulness, intelligence, etc., but they have never summoned the courage or taken the time to tell him. Perhaps they’ve assumed that others have done so. But this is tragically to miss an opportunity. I would say simply this: if you have remarked virtues in a young man that would make him an effective priest, assume that the Holy Spirit has given you this insight so that you might share it with that young man. Believe me, the plainest words you speak could be seeds that will bear fruit thirty, sixty, and a hundredfold.  Finally, if you feel strongly about vocations, pray for them. In the Bible, nothing of moment is ever accomplished apart from prayer. God delights in our cooperation with His grace, but the work of salvation is, at the end of the day, His. So ask Him! Might I suggest a particular intercessor in this regard? Thérèse of Lisieux, the Little Flower, said that she entered the convent “in order to save souls and especially to pray for priests.” She also said that she would spend her Heaven doing good on the earth. Let us, therefore, petition her intercession as we ask the Lord to double the number of our seminarians in the coming years. 

As a cradle Catholic, I was taught that forgiveness is one of the cherished values of Christianity, and yet I struggle to practice it. The struggle soon became a burden as I started focusing on my inability to forgive. During Confession, the priest pointed to the forgiveness of Christ: “He did not just forgive them, but he prayed for their redemption.” Jesus said: “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” This prayer of Jesus reveals an often-neglected fragment. It clearly unveils that the gaze of Jesus was not on the pain or the cruelty of the soldiers but on their lack of knowledge of the truth.  Jesus picked this fragment to intercede for them. The message dawned on me that my forgiveness has to sprout from giving space to the unknown fragments of the other person and even myself. I now feel lighter and more joyful because previously, I was dealing exclusively with the known factors—the hurt that others caused, the words that they spoke, and the brokenness of hearts and relationships. Jesus has already left the gates of forgiveness wide open for me, I just have to tread on this path of humbly acknowledging the unknown fragments within myself and others.  The awareness of the unknown fragments also adds layers of meaning to what Jesus means when He invites us to walk the extra mile. It occurred to me that forgiveness is a journey commencing from the act of forgiveness to an honest intercession. This moment of walking the extra mile, by praying for the good of those who have hurt me, is my walk through Gethsemane. And this is my total surrender to His will. He has lovingly called everyone to eternity and who am I to cause a barrier with my ego and resentment? Opening our hearts to unknown fragments mends our relations with one another and leads us to a deeper relationship with God, giving us and others access to His abundant peace and freedom.

Does God have preferences and favorites? My father, a first-generation Italian immigrant, had a warm, colorful, and inviting family. You’d be welcomed into their homes with double-cheeked kisses just as ever-present aromas of either espresso, garlic, focaccia, or cannoli welcomed your nose and stomach. My mother, on the other hand, had generations of thick deep multicultural roots in Kentucky. Her side of the family made the best southern apple pies, but had more distant and refined demeanors and affections. Each side of the family had its own set of behaviors and custom expectations to follow, and it was confusing to understand which way was correct. These differences and the perceived need to choose between both have been a foundational dilemma for me. It seems as though I’ve always been trying to understand the world by seeking the ultimate source of truth.  Making Sense of it All  Throughout life, I’ve tried to find reasoning in how and why the world, and all its parts, function together. God must have known I’d be destined to question things and be inquisitive of His creations because He made sure I was pointed in the right direction to turn to Him. The Catholic Elementary school I attended had a young wonderful nun as one of my teachers. She seemed to have the same love and curiosity of the world that God had given me. If she didn’t have all the answers, I was pretty certain she knew who did. We were taught that there was only one God and we were all made in the image and likeness of God. We’re unique, and God loves us all very much. He loved us so much that even before Adam and Eve knew the depth and ramifications of their sin, God already had the merciful plan of sending Jesus, His Son, to save us from that original sin. There was so much in that lesson for a little girl to unpack and understand. It still leaves me asking questions. However, it was the ‘image and likeness’ part of that lesson that I had to explore.   Observing my family, classroom, and community, it was obvious there were vast differences in hair color, skin color, and other features. If we are all unique, yet made in the image and likeness of only ONE God, then what did He look like? Was He dark-haired like me? Or blonde like my best friend?  Was His skin olive colored, that tanned deeply in the summer, like my father’s and mine, or was He fair-skinned like my Mom, who turned red and burnt easily under the hot Kentucky sun?  Beautiful Varieties I grew up with variety, was comfortable with variety, and loved variety, but I wondered—did God have a preference? In Kentucky, in the 1960s, it was apparent that even if God didn’t have a preference, some people did. That was so hard for me to understand. Didn’t the young Sister tell me that God made all of us? Doesn’t that mean that He purposely made all the wonderful varieties in this world?  I searched for the source of truth and sometime in my early 30s, a deep yearning to learn more about God led me straight into prayer and the Scripture. Here, I was blessed to learn that He was also looking for me. Psalm 51:6 spoke straight to my heart: “Behold, You desire truth in the innermost being, therefore teach me wisdom in my secret heart.” As time passed, God showed me there was a difference in the way He saw things versus how the world viewed things. The more I read the Bible, prayed, and asked questions, the more I came to know that God is the source of truth. “Jesus said to him, ‘I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.’” (John 14:6) How wonderful it was to finally understand that Jesus is the source of truth! However, that was not all! God was the teacher now, and He wanted to make sure I understood the lesson. “Again Jesus spoke to them, saying: I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but will have the light of life.’” (John 8:12) I had to read it again…Jesus said: ”I am the light of the world…” My brain began to speed up, gears began to engage, and things began to fall into place. My childhood science lessons taught me that ‘light is the source of all colors.’ Therefore, if Jesus is light, then He encompasses all the colors; all colors of the human race. That nagging childhood question was finally answered.  What Color is God? Quite simply, He is light. We are made in His image and likeness, and He has no preference for color because He is ALL color! All His colors are in us, and all our colors are in Him. We are all God’s children, and we are to “live as children of light” (Ephesians 5:8). So, why is the world so sensitive about the many wonderful colors of human skin? God doesn’t prefer one color to another, so why should we? God loves us and all the variety of colors that He made us. It is quite simple, we are called to reflect Him. We are called to bring His light into the world. In other words, we are called to bring God’s presence into the world that doesn’t see things as God wants it to see things. He needs and wants all our varieties to complete His image. Let’s try to reflect Him in this world by being the light we are created from and for. As God’s children whom He loves, let us begin to appreciate all His images as part of the ONE God that made us. 

The auction was closing, but one item remained unwanted. It was fierce competition with buyers competing to outbid each other for everything that was on offer. They eagerly snapped up all the items and the auction was closing up except for one single item—an old violin. Keen to find a buyer, the auctioneer held the string instrument in his hands and offered what he thought was an attractive price: “If anyone is interested, I would sell it for $100.” A deathly hush filled the room. As it became apparent that even that price was not enough to convince anyone to buy the old violin, he reduced the price to $80, then $50, and finally, in desperation, to $20. After another bout of silence, an old gentleman who sat at the back asked: “May I have a look at the violin, please?” The auctioneer, relieved that someone was showing interest in the old violin, conceded. At least the stringed instrument faced the prospect of finding a new owner and home.  A Maestro’s Touch The old man rose from his seat at the back, slowly walked to the front, and carefully examined the old violin. Taking out his handkerchief, he dusted the surface and gently tuned each string until, one by one, they were in the right tones. Finally, and only then, did he place the old violin between his chin and left shoulder, lift the bow with his right hand, and start playing a piece of music. Each musical note from the old violin penetrated the silence in the room and danced delightfully in the air. It stunned everyone, and they listened attentively to what was coming out of the instrument in the hands of what was obvious to all—a maestro.  He played a familiar classical hymn. The melody was so beautiful that it quickly enchanted everyone at the auction and they were awestruck. They had never heard of or even witnessed anyone playing music so beautifully, let alone on an old violin. And they never thought for one moment it would catch their fancy later on when the auction resumed. He finished playing and calmly returned the violin to the auctioneer. Before the auctioneer could even ask everyone in the room if they would still like to buy it, there was a rush in the raising of hands. Everyone suddenly wanted it after the impromptu masterly performance. From an unwanted item a short while earlier, the old violin was suddenly the focus of the most intense bidding competition of the auction. From the starting bid of $20, the price immediately shot up to $500. The old violin was ultimately sold for $10,000, which was 500 times more than its lowest asking price. Astounding Transformation  It took only 15 minutes for the old violin to be transformed from something nobody wanted into the star of the auction. And it took a maestro musician to tune up its strings and play a wonderful melody. He showed that what looked unattractive on the outside was actually a beautiful and priceless soul inside the instrument. Perhaps, like the old violin, our lives normally do not seem to have much worth at first. But if we hand them over to Jesus, who is the maestro above all maestros, then He will be able to play beautiful songs through us and their melodies will stun listeners even more. Our lives, then, will catch the world’s attention. Everyone would then want to listen to the music that He produces out of our lives. The story of this old violin reminds me of my own story. I was metaphorically just like that old violin and nobody thought that I would be useful or could be doing something worthwhile with my life. They looked at me as if I had no value. However, Jesus took pity on me. He turned around, looked at me, and asked me: “Peter, what do you want to do with your life?” I said: "Master, where do you live?" “Come and see,” Jesus answered. So I came and saw where He lived, and stayed with Him. On the past 16th of July, I celebrated the 30th anniversary of my priesthood ordination. To know and experience Jesus’ great love for me…how could I thank Him enough? He has turned the old violin into something new and given it great value. Lord, may our lives become Your musical instrument, like that old violin, so that we may produce beautiful music people can sing forever, giving thanks and praise to Your wonderful love.