Meet a Superstar!

Letting go is not easy…But what happens if you do it? Ever since the age of one, I have been living in a foster home. George and Hazel, our foster parents, took care of almost ten of us. Our foster dad was an aggressive man, and we were all terrified of him. Every problem was addressed through acts of violence; what was even more terrifying was that he would often specifically pick me as his target. I suffer from acute asthma. One night, as I was in bed, coughing and wheezing, struggling to breathe, he came into my room and sat on top of me! He thrashed me so badly that I couldn’t lean on my back or move. Later that night, when everyone fell asleep, my foster parents secretly inspected my back; through the mirror, I not only saw the reflection of my back but also the shock on their faces. The next day, the other boys took a look and said it was blue-black from top to below. Though the people from foster care would come and check on us occasionally, we were too afraid to report on him. Toughest Decision Once his wife passed, his aggression intensified even more. The beatings got worse. One day, he had me in the corner and I was asked to lift my arms to be punched underneath so that there would be no visible bruises. I can't even remember what it was about. I was a fifteen-year-old boy feeling powerless against this grown, strong construction man. He punched me, again and again and again. Then, he looked directly into my eyes and told me something that changed my life forever. I’ll never be able to forget it because it far surpassed the pain of all the beatings he had given me put together. He said that the man who had me should have been castrated. All of a sudden, something sweet got broken inside of me. I remember him clearly asking me to stay there before he went inside. At that moment, I decided to run and never come back. It was snowing that night and I only had one jacket and a pair of shoes. I just ran. Things became horrible when I went to London to meet with my biological mother. We did not really know each other; we ended up arguing so much that I was thrown out of the house. That night, I wandered around as I had nowhere to go. For a split second, I felt like there were two choices before me—to live or call it a day. It was easier to call it a day; I wasn't worried about death. It all happened within a split second, but I told myself: “Yes, I want to live.” For a few nights, I crashed at my friends' places. While bouncing from one place to another, I got in contact with my foster brother Nigel back in Manchester. Over the months spent together, he had become a father figure to me. I started valeting and cleaning cars in his garage; everything was going pretty well. He watched over me and took care of me until one day, while we were at the gym, he suddenly collapsed and died. I was devastated and I fell into the deepest darkest place in my life. Making Amends I had no faith. I didn’t think about God. But one day, I found a video cassette in my letterbox; it was about the story of Jesus. I watched it several times, and I began to realize that there was a presence around me. As time passed, I realized that my relationship with God was growing deeper. The desire to be a Christian grew stronger in me and finally, I got baptized. I remember coming from the Baptism with the biggest smile that I just couldn't take off. As time flew by, I became an intercessor, praying for people who grew up in similar situations. And wonderful things happened. One day, at 5 in the morning, I was praying in my living room. An image of my foster father appeared to me. I had no contact with him, and I wasn’t really bothered about what was happening to him. But there was this strong urge in me that was directing me to see him. I was really nervous about the meeting; the last time I saw him, I was just a boy, and he was beating me. I finally turned up at the hospital. I had envisioned a big strong man, but there on the hospital bed was this frail old man. For a split second, I felt sorry. I asked my foster sister if I could pray for him. So, she woke him up and told him that I was there to pray for him. He said yes and went back to sleep. I pulled out a forgiveness card and put it at the end of the bed. I had some holy water with me and I started reading the last rites. Something strange happened. I prayed in songs and put water on his head. I had never done this before. In my mind, I was saying: “Jesus, do I need to do anything else?” I heard a voice that said: “The abused prays for the abuser and sets him free.” Then it hit me, it must be coming from the Lord…Who else could that come from? When you say: “You abused me, but I choose to forgive you,” the invisible chord that connects you to the abuser is broken at that very moment. It healed me from all the scars that I carried through my teenage years. A lot of that became non-existent and kind of melted away from the moment I forgave him. God used me to save him. It's a miracle in itself. It was phenomenal for me. Shortly after this, I realized there was someone else I needed to forgive–my biological mother–for abandoning me, letting me be abused, and later on, for throwing me out. It felt like I had dropped a whole weight when I forgave her. After that, I began living a godly life. Forgive and Move On God says: “If you forgive somebody in My name, I forgive them too.” He not only allows us to do it, but He will help us to do it. It's extremely hard to be a true Christian. It is very difficult to follow Christ and be Christ-like. It's a very difficult journey but one that is well worth it because when somebody's done something to you, you have the power to set yourself free through forgiveness. From the moment you forgive the person who hurts you, your new life begins. You can look forward to the joy and the beauty that is to come. So, I urge everyone who is holding something against somebody who's done you wrong, to forgive them. Forgiveness is a decision. Forgive. Let God do the rest.

Tom Holland’s magnificent book Dominion develops in detail what amounts to a very simple proposition—namely, that Christianity is responsible for many of the central values that we take for granted and that we assume to be universal. In point of fact, he avers, our insistence upon the dignity of the individual, fundamental human rights, the principle of equality, and perhaps above all that the poor, the marginalized, and the victimized ought to be specially cherished, flows from basic Christian convictions. What prompted Holland to investigate this claim initially was his extensive work in the history of ancient Rome. The longer and more deeply he looked at Roman society, the stranger it seemed, the less like our own time. And the more he studied the great heroes of Rome, the more alien and morally problematic they appeared. To give just one example among many, he urges us to consider perhaps the most impressive of ancient Roman personalities, Julius Caesar. Eager to enhance his political reputation, Caesar embarked on a military campaign in Gaul (present-day France). His remarkable success in subduing this land and making it a Roman province served to cover him in glory and became the subject of his book The Gallic Wars, which is read to this day. But what is rarely remarked upon is the staggering fact that in the course of this conquest, Caesar killed, by conservative estimate, one million people and enslaved another million or so more. Now, Caesar had a boatload of enemies in Rome who suspected him of lusting after kingly power. But what Holland finds fascinating is that none of his opponents were scandalized by his murderous rampage through Gaul. In fact, all of Rome praised him for it. So the question arises: Why would we today consider someone who killed and enslaved on such a massive scale a scoundrel while even the best and brightest in ancient Roman society considered Caesar a hero? The answer, in a word, is Christianity. What the early Christians brought to Roman culture was the belief in the one God who made every human being in His image and likeness and who thereby endowed them with rights, freedom, and dignity. Moreover, the Christians taught, the Creator God became human and went willingly to the very limits of suffering and degradation, in Saint Paul’s words, “accepting even death, death on a cross.” They proclaimed a Savior who was a victim of Roman tyranny and whom God raised from the dead. And by this proclamation, they brought all the tyrannized, all of the victimized, all of the weak and forgotten from the margins to the center. These beliefs were, of course, initially regarded as absurd, and the early Christians were brutally persecuted for them. But over time, and through the witness and practice of courageous people, these beliefs soaked into the fabric of Western society. So deeply did they penetrate our consciousness that we came, as Holland has argued, to take them for granted and to mistake them for general humanistic values. Now, why is all this important to us today? We live in a time when the Christian faith is rather regularly denigrated by those in the upper echelons of elite society, in the universities, and in the media. Moreover, armies of people, especially the young, are disaffiliating from the churches and ceasing to engage in religious ritual and practice. Harmless enough, you might think, or even to the advantage of a society reaching maturity through secularization? Think again. As Christian faith and praxis evanesce, the values that Christianity has inculcated in our culture evanesce as well. Cut flowers may bloom for a time once they’ve been ripped from the soil and placed in water, but they will fade soon enough. We delude ourselves if we think that the values instilled in us by Christianity will long survive the demise of Christianity itself. Signs of the emergence of a neo-paganism in fact abound. In many states in our country, as well as in Canada and many European countries, a regime of euthanasia holds sway. When elderly or sick people become inconvenient, they can and should be eliminated. And, of course, in most countries in the West, when a child in the womb is judged to be a problem, he or she can be aborted at any point in pregnancy, up to the moment of birth. In my home state of Minnesota, a proposal has been made to enshrine this ‘right’ to the murder of the unborn in the constitution. How like this is, by the way, to the ancient Roman practice of exposing unwanted newborns to the elements and the animals. And how fascinating, in light of Tom Holland’s analysis, that the early Christians got the attention of the environing Roman culture precisely by their willingness to rescue and take in these abandoned babies. So, what is the needful thing? Christians must raise their voices in protest against the culture of death. And they must do so by claiming and publicly proclaiming the values that come from their faith. For too long, believers have been cowed into silence by the insinuation that religion is a ‘private’ matter. Nonsense. Christian values have informed our society from the beginning and have provided the coherent moral framework that most of us still take for granted. Now is not the time for quietude. It is time for us to shout our convictions from the rooftops.

Q – Later this year, my brother is getting civilly married to another man. I am very close with my brother, but I know that marriage is between a man and a woman. Would I be allowed to attend his wedding? A—This question is becoming increasingly pressing, as so many of our family and friends live lifestyles that contradict God's revealed plan for our fulfillment. Such a quandary can cause great angst since we want to love our family and support them, even if we disagree with their choices. At the same time, we cannot betray what we know to be true, as we believe that God’s plan leads to authentic happiness. The Catechism of the Catholic Church (Paragraph 1868) deals with this when it speaks about ways in which we can cooperate in someone else’s sinful choice. We participate in someone else’s sin when we ‘praise or approve’ of the sinful action. In the case of someone making a lifestyle choice that goes against our Catholic Faith, it would be morally wrong for us to in any way congratulate or celebrate this choice, which ultimately harms their relationship with God and puts their salvation in jeopardy. So what would be the best course of action? I would recommend an honest conversation with your brother. Share your deep love for him, and how you desire this relationship to continue being close. At the same time, share with him how your faith and conscience teach you that you cannot approve of things that you know to be wrong. Do not attend the wedding, send a gift, or congratulate him, but be sure to let him know that you are still there for him. Emphasize that it is not out of ‘hate’ or ‘bigotry’ that you cannot attend the wedding, but out of a firm and unchanging belief that God created marriage as something sacred between a man and a woman. This may or may not cause strife and conflict in your family. But we must never forget that Jesus promised: “Not to bring peace, but the sword”. He said that we must follow Him above any other relationship, including that of family and friends. This is certainly one of His difficult teachings, but we remember that truth and love are never in opposition, and to truly love your brother, you must love him according to the truth that Christ reveals. Never forget, too, the power of prayer and fasting. Pray and fast before your conversation with your brother so that his heart may be open to your goodwill, and pray and fast after the conversation so that he may experience a deep conversion to Christ, Who alone fulfills the human heart. Do not be afraid to choose Christ over your family, and continue to love your family— in and through Christ— regardless of your brother’s reaction. Do not be afraid, but continue to love in truth.

In the year 1240, Emperor Frederick II of Sweden was at war with the Pope, and he sent his warriors to attack Italy. The cruel soldiers decided to break into the cloistered convent of San Damiano, which was located on the border of the town of Assisi. This was where Mother Clare and the nuns under her care resided. The poor nuns were terrified and immediately rushed to their Mother to share the news. Mother Clare was bedridden, but with the help of the sisters, she got up and calmly went to the chapel. Prostrating herself in front of the Eucharist, she tearfully implored God to protect the helpless sisters. Suddenly, she heard a voice from the tabernacle: “I will always protect you!” Filled with confidence and trust, she took the ciborium containing the Blessed Sacrament and went to face the invaders. As she raised it in front of them, the soldiers were thrown into confusion and utter fear. They instantly fled the convent, abandoning their evil schemes. To the nuns, their mother’s unwavering devotion to the Holy Eucharist was a great lesson. Saint Clare, in her great humility, instructed the sisters not to reveal the voice they heard from the Blessed Sacrament until after her death. Let us, inspired by Saint Clare, grow in our devotion to Jesus in the Eucharist and put our complete trust in Him.