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Trapped in the busy and burdensome web of everyday life, is it possible to keep yourself connected to God?

Sometimes, it seems as though my faith goes through seasons each year. At certain times, it is blossoming like the sunbathed flowers of summer. This is usually during vacation time. At other times, my faith feels like the sleeping world of winter—dormant, not in full bloom. This is typical during the school year when my schedule does not allow for daily adoration or hourly prayer breaks, unlike the free vacation times. These hectic months are usually occupied by classes, chores, activities, and time with family and friends.

It is easy, amidst the hustle and bustle, not to necessarily forget God but to let Him fall into the background. We may go to church every Sunday, say our prayers, and even pray a daily Rosary, but we keep our faith and ‘normal’ life separate. Religion and God are not meant to be saved strictly for Sundays or summer breaks. Faith is not something we should cling to solely in times of distress or return to briefly just to give thanks and then forget. Rather, faith should be interwoven with every area of our daily life too.

Daily Humdrum

Whether we own our own house, stay in a college dorm, or live with our family, there are certain jobs we cannot escape. Homes must be clean, clothes must be washed, food must be made…Now, these tasks all seem like boring necessities—things that mean nothing, yet we still have to do them. They even take up the time we could have used to step into the adoration chapel for thirty minutes or attend daily mass. Yet, when we have little children at home who need clean clothes or parents coming home after work who would like to find scrubbed floors, this isn’t always a realistic alternative.

Filling our time with these necessities, though, doesn’t have to become time taken away from God.

Saint Thérèse of Lisieux is well known for her “little way.” This method centers on the little things with immense love and intention. In one of my favorite stories of Saint Therese, she wrote about a pot in the kitchen that she hated to wash (Yes, even Saints have to wash dishes!). She found the task incredibly disagreeable, so she decided to offer it to God. She would finish the chore with such joy, knowing that something seemingly meaningless was given purpose by bringing God into the equation. Whether we’re washing dishes, folding laundry, or scrubbing floors, each boring chore can become a prayer by simply dedicating it to God.

Magnified Joy

Sometimes, when the secular society looks at the religious community, they do so with the assumption that the two worlds can never collide. I’ve been shocked to learn that so many people think you can’t follow the Bible and have fun! This could not be further from the truth.

Some of my favorite activities include surfing, dancing, singing, and photography; much of my time is devoted to doing them. Often, I dance to religious music and create videos for Instagram paired with a message of faith in my caption. I’ve sung in church as a cantor and love using my gifts to serve God directly. Yet, I also love performing in shows like The Wizard of Oz or photographing football games—secular things that bring me great joy. This joy is further magnified when I offer these activities to the Lord.

Backstage of a show, you will always find me praying before my entrance, offering the performance to God, and asking for Him to be with me as I dance or sing. Simply working out to stay in shape is something else I both enjoy and value to maintain my health. Before I start a run, I offer it to God. Often, in the middle of it, I place my exhaustion in His hands and ask Him for the strength to help me make the final mile. One of my favorite ways to exercise and worship God is to go for a rigorous Rosary walk, thereby working out both my body and my spiritual well-being!

In Everything, Everywhere

We do often forget to find God in other people, don’t we? One of my favorite books is a biography of Mother Teresa. The author, Father Leo Maasburg, knew her personally. He recalls once seeing her deep in prayer as a reporter timidly inched up, afraid to interrupt to ask his question. Curious as to how she would react, Father was surprised to see her turn to the reporter with joy and love on her face rather than irritation. He remarked how, in her mind, she had simply turned her attention from Jesus to Jesus.

Jesus tells us: “Truly I tell you, just as you did it to one of the least of these who are members of my family,[a] you did it to me.” (Matthew 25:40). But Jesus is not only found in the poor or the sick. He’s found in our siblings, our friends, our teachers, and coworkers. Simply showing love, kindness, and mercy to those who stumble across our path can be yet another way to give love to God in our busy lives. When you bake cookies for a friend’s birthday or even just go out to lunch with someone you haven’t seen in a while, you can bring God’s love into their lives and further fulfill His will.

Wherever You are…

Within our own lives, we move through different stages as we age and grow. The daily routines of a priest or a nun will look very different from those of a faithful layperson with a family to care for. The daily routines of a high schooler will likewise be different from the routines of the same individual once they’ve reached adulthood. That is what is so beautiful about Jesus—He meets us where we are. He doesn’t want us to leave Him at the altar; in the same way, He doesn’t simply leave us when we exit His church. So, instead of feeling like you’ve let go of God as your life gets busy, find ways to invite Him into everything you do, and you will find that everything in your life becomes infused with greater love and purpose.

You may or may not be a good dancer, but you are still called to sway in this dance of life

It was a beautiful morning; the sun was shining brightly, and I could feel its warmth seeping into my exhausted bones. By contrast, mentally, I was in great spirits, enjoying the beautiful Perth scenery as I strolled along the foreshore at Matilda Bay.

I paused on the riverbank to allow the natural beauty to fill my senses. The melody of waves breaking on the shore, the cool breeze gently ruffling through my hair as it danced through the trees, the subtle scent of salt and bushland, the delicate mosaic of tiny white shells adorning the sand…I felt rather overwhelmed by the experience.

An image of ballroom dancing flashed through my head. In my mind’s eye, I pictured God dancing with me…

Syncing in

When you begin ballroom dancing, there is a phase where your whole attention is focused on trying to remain in sync with your partner and avoid mistakes. You are consumed with fear of stumbling over the other person’s feet or moving the wrong foot in the wrong direction. Consequently, this self-conscious effort to control your movements makes your body stiff and rigid, making it difficult for your partner to lead you in the steps of the dance. But if you loosen up, flow with the music, and let your partner be the guide, he will lead you in a beautiful, enchanting, rhythmic dance.

If you allow this to happen, you will speedily learn to dance as beautifully as your partner, feeling your feet moving gracefully across the floor as you enjoy the rhythm of the dance.

Hold My Hands

Reflecting on that image, I felt as if God was saying: “You and I are partners in this dance of life, but we cannot dance well together if you don’t allow Me to lead you. I am the expert, guiding you to excel if you follow Me, but I cannot if you insist on keeping control. On the contrary, if you surrender yourself and allow Me to lead you in this dance, I will keep you safe, and we will dance beautifully. Do not be afraid to stumble on My feet because I know how to guide you. So, entrust yourself to My embrace and join Me in this dance together. Wherever the music takes us, I will show you the way.”

As I pondered these thoughts, I felt a deep sense of gratitude to God, for always being present in my life, leading me in this dance. He knows my every thought and desire and never fails to bring them to fruition in ways I do not expect (Psalm 139).

God accompanies each of us in this dance of life, always ready to take us in His arms and guide us expertly. Some of us are beginners, still taking baby steps, while others are advanced enough to assist the rest, but none of us are so advanced that we could ever afford to step away from the lead dancer.

More Happier, Less Anxious

Even Our Lady, God’s perfect dancing partner, knows that her expertise in the dance comes from following His every move with perfect grace. From an early age, Mary accepted His loving embrace, following His lead perfectly in even the smallest things. Her ear was attentive to the rhythm of Heavenly music so that she never took a false step.

Mary was perfectly at one with God in mind and heart. Her will was so in tune with God that she could utter: “Be it done to me according to Your will” (Luke 1:38). What God wants is also what Mary wants.

If we let go of our desire to serve ourselves first and, like Mary, lose ourselves in the Lord’s embrace, our lives will be freer, happier, more meaningful, and less anxious, stressful, and depressing.

How often do we muse over not getting enough time to do the things we like? This New Year, let’s make a difference.

I have never really been one to make New Year’s resolutions. I am reminded of this as I look at the stack of unread books gathering dust on my desk, purchased in the previous years in an ambitious yet miserably failed attempt. A book a month turned into a stack of unread intentions. I had a million reasons as to why I wasn’t successful in my resolution, but lack of time wasn’t one of them.

Looking back now on the years lost with a slight disappointment in myself, I realize I really could have made better use of my time. How often in my life have I complained about not having enough time to do the things I’d like? Certainly more than I can count!

A few years ago, sitting next to my husband in the hospital on New Year’s Eve as he received his routine treatment, something tugged at my heart. Observing him uncomfortably connected to his intravenous infusion, I noticed that his eyes were closed and his hands were folded in prayer. Apparently feeling my quizzical stare, he slightly opened one eye and, while peeking at me, quietly whispered: “Everyone.”

Somehow, he read my mind. We often pray for those around us whom we perceive as hurting or in need of prayers, but today, we were sitting alone, and I was puzzled as to who he may have been praying for. It was moving and inspiring to think that he was praying for “everyone” and not just those who we assume could use prayers because of their outward appearances.

Everyone—every one of us needs prayers. We are all in need of God’s grace and mercy regardless of the image we project to the world. This seems true, especially now when so many people are silently suffering from loneliness, financial trouble, and even mental health struggles that are often hidden away.

No one truly knows what another person is going through, has gone through, or will go through. How powerful would it be if we all prayed for each other? How life-changing, world-changing, it could be. So this New Year, I am resolving to use my spare time more wisely and thoughtfully—prayerfully considering the sufferings and needs of others, those others that I know, those that I don’t know, those who have come before me, and those who will come long after.

I am going to pray for all of humanity, trusting that our dear God, in His abundant mercy and immeasurable love, will bless us all.

Gifts are part and parcel of Christmas, but do we realize the value of The Gift we have been so freely given?

I was awakened one December morning by my son Timmy’s exuberant proclamation: “Mom! Guess know what?” (his way of expressing an invitation to respond, without a requirement to wait). He was brimming over with the need to impart urgent information…so pronto! 

Seeing my eyelids forced apart, he blurted out with glee, “Santa brought ME a bike and YOU a bike!” The truth, of course, was that the larger bike was for his big sister, but as you can imagine, that was actually a bit of irrelevant information; what really mattered was Timmy got his heart’s fondest wish—a new bike!

The season that causes many of us to pause and linger nostalgically on memories from the past is fast approaching. There is something about Christmas that brings us back to those times as children when life was simple, and our happiness was predicated on having the desires of our hearts filled as we opened the gifts under the tree. 

Switching the Lens

As any parent knows, having a child completely shifts our perspective from life being about what is important to us to being all about meeting our child’s needs and often, wants. It’s almost as if we gingerly dusted off our own View-Master toy and handed it, freely and happily, to our offspring with nary a thought! For those of you fortunate enough to open one of those toys on Christmas morning, you will remember it came with a thin cardboard reel containing pairs of small Kodachrome photographs that, when viewed through the apparatus, created the illusion of three-dimensional scenes. Once a child comes into our family, we see everything not just through our own lens but through theirs. Our world expands, and we remember, and in some ways relive, the innocence of the childhood we left behind long ago. 

Not everyone has a carefree, secure childhood, but many are fortunate to remember the good in their lives while the difficulties we experience growing up recede in time. Still, what we focus on repeatedly will shape the way we ultimately live our lives. Perhaps that is why it is said, “It’s never too late to have a happy childhood!” What this requires, however, is intention and practice, especially through choices such as expressing gratitude. Repeated peering through a View-Master, which once enlarged the landscape of our small worlds, led us to recognize beauty, colors, and different dimensions in the pictures within our field of vision. In the same way, a frequent habitual practice of gratitude can lead to seeing of life as a prospect of opportunities, healing, and forgiveness rather than a series of disappointments, hurts, and offenses. 

Social scientists, who examine and observe how individuals interact and behave with each other, have concluded that gratitude practices are psychologically helpful. “Thanking others, thanking ourselves, Mother Nature, or the Almighty – gratitude in any form can enlighten the mind and make us feel happier. It has a healing effect on us” (Russell & Fosha, 2008). A wise proverb says, “Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgiving, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings.”

Untouched Gift

Pondering the past leads to remembrance. Focusing on the things we should be grateful for reveals what we couldn’t grasp in our youth…that is, until we receive the gift of a View-Master one Christmas! In truth, we have all been given one, but not all have opened theirs. One present lying under the tree may remain there while other gifts topped with colorful bows are eagerly scooped up by outstretched hands. Was the reluctance of the recipient to select a particular package based on the subdued hues of the plain wrapping? Perhaps the lack of curled ribbons and gift tags? The View-Master inside would open new vistas, bring new adventures, and change the world of the one who opens it, but that recognition requires receptivity from the receiver. And when a gift is presented by another in a way that doesn’t invite curiosity, it will likely remain untouched. 

Those who have been longing for a View-Master, who actively look for it under the tree, who are able to trust that something better lies underneath the simple exterior, won’t be disappointed. They know that the best presents often come unexpectedly, and once they are opened, their appreciation develops as their value is recognized. Eventually, as more time is spent exploring the many facets of the gift, the treasure now becomes a cherished part of the receiver’s life.

Time to Unwrap!

There was a certain group of people long ago who were hoping to be given what had been promised to them for years. Yearning for it, they lived in anticipation that one day they would receive it. When the time came for this promise to be delivered, it was wrapped in ordinary cloth, and was so small that in the darkness of the night, only a few shepherds knew of its arrival. As the light began to grow, some people tried to block it, but the shadows gave evidence of this light’s influence. Reminded of the value of becoming a child again, many people began walking with this Light that illuminated their path. With enhanced clarity and vision, meaning and purpose began to frame their daily lives. Filled with wonder and amazement, their understanding deepened. For generations since, numerous individuals’ devotion has been strengthened with the remembrance of receiving the promised Word that became flesh. The realization of what they were given changed everything.

This Christmas, may you receive the desire of your heart, as my son did many years ago. As our eyes open, we too may exclaim, “Guess know what?” God brought ME a “Wonderful Counselor” and YOU the “Prince of Peace!” If you have unwrapped this precious gift, you know the fulfillment and joy that follows. As we respond with gratitude, it causes us to want others to experience what we’ve received. Thoughtful consideration of how we present what we now want to give increases the likelihood that the gift will be opened. How will I deliver the treasure I’ve discovered? Will I swath it in love? Cover it with joy? Envelop it in a peaceful heart? Cloak it in patience? Enfold it with kindness? Package it in generosity? Protect it through faithfulness? Bundle it with gentleness? 

Perhaps the final fruit of the Holy Spirit might be considered, if the recipient is not yet ready to open this gift.  Could we then choose to encase our treasure in self-control?

In the darkest night, we see the brightest stars. Let your light shine.

Imagine the anticipation of a still dark night in the depths of a rough-hewn cave. Close enough to the city to hear the chatter of Bethlehem bursting at its seams but far away enough to feel separate. The cave, a stable carpeted with straw and smelling strongly of animals and dirt, is blanketed in darkness. 

Listen. Hear the muffled prayers and murmurs, the contented sucking of a baby nursing at the breast. A child, robust and precious, cradled by His mother and father. Above, a bright celestial light beams down upon this cave, the only sign that this is anything but an inauspicious event. 

The babe, freshly delivered and wrapped in swaddling clothes made and embroidered by His mother…contented from His feed, He reposes peacefully. Outside, in the bustling city of Bethlehem, no one is aware of the magnitude of this event.

A Deep, Dark Cave

In the Orthodox tradition, the icon of the Nativity is depicted in the depths of a cave. This is two-fold. In the first instance, stables were often rough-hewn out of rock at the time of Our Lord’s birth. The second reason is more symbolic. 

It is precisely this darkened cave that provides the juxtaposition of the light of Christ—breaking through time and space and rock—God coming down to earth. This cave too, tomblike in appearance, prefigures His Passion and Death.

Here in this one icon is written the reality of a seismic event that changed the life of man forever. This one child, this sweet babe nestled in the arms of His grace-filled mother “is destined for the fall and rise of many in Israel, and to be a sign that will be contradicted” (Luke 2: 34).

A Deep, Dark heart

Each one of us has inherited a fallen human nature. It is our concupiscence—our inclination to sin—that causes our own hearts to darken. It is then, no surprise that we find in Matthew’s Gospel, the exhortation: “Blessed are the clean of heart, for they will see God” (Matthew 5:8).

We might like to think that if we were alive in the time of Jesus, we would not have failed to recognize Him in our midst. But this thought, I fear, is pride. It is much more likely that unless our faith was built on a solid foundation and we were open to the Messiah’s arrival, we would have had trouble finding Him even if He stood right in front of us.

And sometimes, we fail to see Him now when He’s right in front of us. Do we really recognize Him in the Eucharist? Or in the distressing disguise of the poor? Or even in the people around us—especially those who annoy us?

Not always. And perhaps not even consistently. But there are remedies for that.

Reflect the Light

Saint Josemaria Escriva cautions us: “But don’t forget that we are not the source of this light: we only reflect it.” If we think of our hearts as being a mirror, we realize that even small marks on the surface will alter the reflection. The more sullied the mirror becomes, the less we reflect Christ’s light to others. If, however, we routinely maintain the cleanliness of the mirror, its reflection is not obscured in any way. 

So then, how do we keep our hearts clean? Try these five simple steps this Christmas to make our hearts clean enough to reflect the light of that babe, the Prince of Peace, to others. May we recognize Him in the cave, in the world, and in the people around us.

1. Pray for a clean heart

Ask our Lord to help you resist the temptations of sin and strengthen your daily prayer habits. Receive Him worthily in the Eucharist so that He consumes you. “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me” (Psalm 51:10).

2. Exercise humility

You will stumble more than a few times in your spiritual journey. Frequent the Sacrament of Confession and seek out a good, holy priest for spiritual direction.

3. Read the Gospels 

Reading and meditating on the Gospels are wonderful ways to come to a deeper understanding and a closer relationship with Our Lord. “Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you.” (James 4:8)

4. Receive the light 

Willingly and lovingly accept the teachings of Christ and His Church, even when it is difficult. Pray for clarity and understanding when you’re not sure what is required of you.

5. Deflect the dark 

Saint Mother Teresa of Calcutta once said: “Words which do not give the light of Christ increase the darkness.” In other words, if whatever conversations we have or media we consume are not bringing the light of Christ to us, then it follows that they are doing the opposite. By being sensible about the entertainment or influences we enjoy, we really deflect those that do not bring Christ’s light.

Countless times have I felt that nobody knows what I’m going through. As I struggle, I’ve yearned for someone who would look at me and say, “I know exactly how you feel.” Even those who suffer similarly cannot understand exactly what is in my heart. Often, at those times, it seems that human love falls short of what I crave. People don’t live up to my expectations for what I desire in love, and often, I fall short of others’ expectations for love. 

Yet during those times, I realized that everything I desire is possible. At Christmas time, we see how God became man so that He could feel everything that we feel in our human weakness. He knows what it means to suffer as we do. This serves to remind us that there is someone who understands our pain, someone who suffers with us. 

The fact that God chose to become human for me demonstrates the magnitude of His love. That love and understanding I crave from human beings is demonstrated in the choice God made to sacrifice Himself for me by becoming human. There is no greater love story ever written than our God becoming a tiny dependent baby, all for us!

People are often surprised when I tell them that my closest friend at the monastery is Fr. Philip, who happens to be 94. He being the oldest monk of the community, and me being the youngest, make quite the duo; another fellow monk affectionately refers to us as the “alpha and omega.” In addition to our discrepancy in age, there are numerous differences between us. Fr. Philip served in the Coast Guard before entering the monastery, studied Botany and English, has lived in Rome and Rwanda, and is fluent in several languages. In short, he has much more life experience than me. That said, we do share some things in common: we’re both California natives and converts from Protestantism (he Presbyterian and me Baptist). We enjoy opera immensely, and more importantly, we lead a life of prayer together.

It is only natural to select friends who share our common interests. But as we get older and our situations in life transition, we find ourselves losing some friends while gaining new ones. Aristotle says that all friendships must share something in common. Enduring friendships are those that share long-lasting things. For example, friendship between two surfers persists as long as there are waves to be caught. However, if there is no swell or if one surfer gets injured and can no longer paddle out, the friendship will fade unless they find something new to share. Therefore, if we wish to have lifelong friends, the key is to find something that can be shared for a lifetime, or better yet, eternity.

The high priest, Caiaphas, accused Jesus of blasphemy when He claimed to be the Son of God. Far more blasphemous than this statement was when Jesus told His disciples, “You are my friends.” For what could the Son of God have in common with fishermen, a tax collector, and a zealot? What can God possibly have in common with us? He is much older than we are. He has more life experience. He is both Alpha and Omega. Whatever we share in common must have been given to us by Him in the first place. Among the many gifts He shares with us, Scripture is explicit about which lasts the longest: “His steadfast love endures forever.” “Love…endures all things.” “Love never ends.” As it turns out, being friends with God is quite simple. All we have to do is “love because He first loved us.”

1. Get a hands-on experience on how God can use the stuff of earth to communicate the stuff of heaven

When I walked out my front door to bring in the garbage cans one day, I stopped short in fear. There was a fresh snakeskin draped over the drain cover next to the house. I immediately called out to my husband, since I have this thing with snakes. 

When it became clear that this was only snakeskin and there were no snakes nearby, I relaxed. and asked God what lesson He was trying to teach me that day.

What’s the whole point?

I’m what teachers call a kinesthetic learner. I learn best by moving or interacting with things. Lately, I’ve noticed that God often reveals Himself to me through material objects. This divine pedagogy is even alluded to in the Catechism of the Catholic Church.

“God, who creates and conserves all things by his Word, provides men with constant evidence of himself in created realities.” (CCC, 54)

For instance, God sent a smoking fire pot and flaming torch to Abraham, a wrestling angel to Jacob, and a burning bush to Moses. God sent a dove carrying an olive branch and then a rainbow to Noah, some dew to Gideon, and a raven with bread and meat to Elijah.

The God of Abraham, the God of Jacob, and the God of Moses is also our God. Why wouldn’t the God of all creation use the visible, tangible matter of earth to communicate invisible and intangible realities of Heaven?

Fr. Jacques Philippe has written, “As creatures of flesh and blood, we need the support of material things in order to attain spiritual realities. God knows this, and it is what explains the whole mystery of the Incarnation” (Time for God, p. 58).

God can send us messages via a license plate or a bumper sticker. Last week the words on the back of a truck, “keep moving,” resonated with me. They reminded me of the homily insight I heard that very morning — that we are called to keep sharing the Gospel.

God might also use nature to teach us. While picking cherries recently, I was reminded of how the harvest is abundant, and the laborers are few. A stormy day might bring to mind that “we are surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses” (Hebrews 12:1). A beautiful bird or gorgeous sunset might be God’s way of lifting our sagging spirit.

Whenever I am particularly surprised by something, I try to ask God what lesson He might be teaching me. The other night, for instance, when I was debating about getting out of bed to check on my daughter, a prayer card honoring St. Monica, the patron saint of mothers, suddenly fell off my dresser. I immediately got up and checked on her. Or the time when I woke up in the wee hours of the night and felt called to pray a rosary on behalf of a recently deceased family member and was delighted to see the most glorious shooting star.

Sometimes God sends His message through other people. How many times have you received a card, phone call, or text from someone that was just the encouragement you needed?

One summer, while on a bike ride mulling over the possibility of discontinuing my Bible study, I ran into a friend. Out of the blue, she brought up the fact that she planned to keep her Bible study going because once you stop something, it is very hard to get it going again.

God might also use concrete objects to discipline us or help us grow in our discipleship.

One morning I stumbled across three large nails. They were identical, but I had found them at three different places: a gas station, my driveway, and down the street. By the third nail, I stopped and asked God what He was trying to tell me and realized I was in need of repentance about something in my life.

I’ll never forget the time I stepped outside, and instantly a fly flew into my eye. I’ll let you use your imagination for that lesson learned.

Learning Style

God teaches us all the time, and He accommodates all types of learners. What works for one person may not work for another. Some will hear God more clearly at Mass, others at Eucharistic Adoration, when reading the Bible, or in their private prayer time.  However, God is always at work and continually teaching us through our thoughts, feelings, images, Scripture passages, people, imagination, words of knowledge, music, and each event of our day.

I personally appreciate it when God communicates through physical objects, as I tend to remember the lesson better that way. You might be wondering what I learned from the snakeskin. It brought the following scripture to mind: “People do not put new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise the skins burst, the wine spills out, and the skins are ruined. Rather, they pour new wine into fresh wineskins, and both are preserved” (Matthew 9:17).

Holy Spirit, help us to be more aware of any lessons You might be teaching us today.

When your soul is exhausted and you don’t know how to calm your mind…

You might be familiar with how Saint Francis of Assisi once asked: “Who are You, Lord my God, and who am I?” He raised his hands in the offering, and from them rose a golden ball as he said: “Lord God, I am nothing, but all of it is Yours.”

I first heard this story on a silent retreat where we were tasked to contemplate the same question: Who are You, Lord my God, and who am I? In the chapel, before the Blessed Sacrament, I fell to my knees and prayed that prayer.

God revealed my heart to me, covered in layers of old blood-soaked bandages, wounded and hardened. Over the years, I had built barriers around my heart to protect it. In that chapel, I realized I couldn’t heal myself; I needed God to rescue me. I cried to Him: “I don’t have a golden ball to give; all I have is my wounded heart!” I felt God reply: “My beloved daughter, that IS the golden ball. I will take it.”

In tears, I mimed, pulling my heart from my chest, and raised my hands in offering, saying: “Lord God, I am nothing, but all of it is Yours.” I was overcome with His presence, and I knew I was completely healed of an affliction that had held me in bondage for most of my life. On the wall beside me, I noticed a copy of Rembrandt’s Return of the Prodigal Son, and immediately I felt that my Father had welcomed me home. I was the prodigal daughter returned in poverty and distress, feeling unworthy and repentant, whom He received tenderly as His daughter.

Often, our worldly understanding of love limits our understanding of what God can do for us. Human love, no matter how well-intentioned, is conditional. But God’s love is unfailing and extravagant! God is never outdone in generosity; He will not hold back His affection.

Pride or fear makes us offer God only the best of ourselves, which prevents Him from transforming the parts we devalue. To receive His healing, we must surrender everything to Him and let Him decide how He will transform us. God’s healing is often unexpected. It requires our full trust. Therefore, we should listen to God, who wants the absolute best for us. Hearing God starts when we surrender everything to Him. By placing God first in our lives, we begin to cooperate with Him. God wants our whole selves—the good, the bad, and the ugly because He wants to transform these dark places with His healing light. God waits patiently for us to find Him in our littleness and brokenness.

Let us run to God and embrace Him like lost children returning home to their Father, knowing He will receive us with open arms. We can pray like Francis: “Lord God, I am nothing, but all of it is Yours,” trusting that He will consume us with transforming fire and say: “I will take all of it and make you brand new.”

Beginning the first day of my incarceration, I have been building a relationship with God. I often feel regret that it took such a tragedy for me to submit to my need for Him, but even more often I feel grateful that I have found a burning passion for life in the Lord. My desire to seek Him sprang from prayer. I prayed intently for those suffering the crushing consequences of my dangerous actions driven by addictions. It was during this prayer time that God revealed His unconditional love for me and called me into kinship with Him through His Son, Jesus Christ. My journey, building a relationship with God during these years in prison, reminds of the techniques needed to build the foundation for a camp-fire, a skill I had developed in the past when I was free to spend my time enjoying the outdoors. I cleared the ground to make room for my new love.

Like the stones I placed around the fire pit, I surrounded myself with others seeking self-improvement via divine guidance. Church became the bedrock on which my foundation was laid. I listened carefully to The Word, and did my best to apply it in my daily activities. But my fire pit was empty. I set out to add elements to build my fire pit.

Small portions of time were dedicated to communal prayer, Bible study gatherings and group recovery sessions. These small additions, like kindling were needed to start the fire burning, but I knew that I needed something more substantial to add, or my fire would be sure to burn out quickly. I fervently sought for something I could dedicate my life that would consolidate my bond with God. The answer came in the form of service work.

It was service to others, whether in the simple form of a listening ear, or working in leadership positions dedicated to teaching my peers, that brought me true joy. I piled the giant logs of service positions onto my nest of kindling. Now I needed something flammable for ignition.

Much to my surprise, unique accelerators were express delivered by the Lord Himself. Counselling sessions with our Chaplain, professional mentoring with my work supervisor, and the loving support of my family back home, gave me the encouragement I desperately needed to ask forgiveness for my past and believe in my future. I poured all their loving guidance onto the firewood with eager expectation. The time had finally come to set my constructed masterpiece ablaze.

I found the perfect spark in the Living Word. For an entire year I cupped this crucial element. I fed it oxygen while digesting God’s teaching, direction and wisdom and carefully placed the spark near the base of my structure. God assisted by gently blowing against the spark, and a fire of love for Jesus roared into life in my heart.

Today, this fire burns warm and bright. The love I share with the Lord has satisfied all that I have ever longed for. Prior to incarceration, I was lost and distracted by worldly pleasures, trapped in its pitfalls, feeling desperately drained and directionless. As someone lost in the wilderness of life, there is no survival without fire. My life is meaningful in the Lord, and it is so much easier to see hope in opportunity by the light of this fire.

Maria Stardero, a 12-year-old girl, was led by her aunt into the church where dozens of boys were standing about or kneeling in prayer as they waited for Don Bosco to arrive for confessions. As she made her way to a pew, some of the boys noticed that the young girl’s eyes had no corneas and resembled white marbles.

When Don Bosco arrived, he asked the girl about her condition. She had not been born blind, she told him, but because of eye disease she had completely lost her sight two years earlier. When he inquired about medical treatment, her aunt began to sob. They had tried everything, but doctors had only one thing to say: “It is incurable!”

“Can you tell whether things are big or small?” Don Bosco asked the child.

“I can’t see anything.”

He led her to a window to see if she could perceive light, but she couldn’t.

“Would you like to see?” Don Bosco asked.

“Oh, yes! It’s the only thing I want,” said the girl, breaking down in tears.

“Will you use your eyes for the good of your soul and not to offend God?”

“I promise I will, with all my heart!”

“Good,” said Don Bosco. “You will regain your sight.”

After recourse to Mary, Help of Christians, Don Bosco recited the Hail Mary and blessed the girl. Then holding a medal of Mary Help of Christians before the girl’s eyes he asked, “For the glory of God and the Blessed Virgin, tell me what I’m holding in my hand.”

“She can’t . . .” the elderly aunt began, but Don Bosco paid no heed. After a few seconds, the child shouted, “I see!” Immediately she described the medal in great detail. But when she stretched out her hand to receive it, it rolled into a dark corner.

The aunt moved to retrieve it, but Don Bosco motioned her back.

“Let her find it to see if the Blessed Virgin has thoroughly restored her sight,” he insisted. Immediately, the girl walked to the dark corner and bent down to retrieve the tiny object. As the many witnesses looked on, awed and profoundly moved, Maria, thanked Don Bosco profusely and with sobs of great joy.

Entrust everything to Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament and to Mary, Help of Christians and you will see what miracles are! Saint John Bosco